Now playing

The Loo Break Song

Chords

Listen

YouTubeYouTube SpotifySpotify AppleApple Music

Gmajor

90BPM

Lyrics & ChordsClick chords to see diagrams

The Loo Break Song
Martin Pearson
The Unfinished Spelling Errors of Bolkein (2004)
TTTO: The Battle Hymn of the Republic.
[Verse 1]
GMy eyes have seen the glory of the return of the king,
CIt was three long hours of movie to Gdestroy a single D7ring.
GBut my bladder would be gladder if they'd B7melt the bloody Emthing,
AmAnd bring the D7credits Gon.
[Chorus]
GOh, good lord I need a loo break,
COh, good lord I need a Gloo break,
GOh, good lord I need a Emloo break,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 2]
GIt started many years ago, when Sauron ruled the land,
CBut Gil-Galad and Isuldur set Gout to thwart his D7plan.
GYoung Isuldur defeated him and B7cut of half his Emhand,
AmBut the film kD7eeps rolGling on.
[Verse 3]
GMuch later on in Mount Doom where the hobbits come at last,
CFrodo gives Smeagol the finger and then GGollum gets the D7shaft.
GThe ring and he both melted, how we B7clapped and cheered and Emlaughed,
AmBut the film kD7eeps rolGling on.
[Chorus]
GOh, good lord I need a loo break,
COh, good lord I need a Gloo break,
GOh, good lord I need a Emloo break,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 4]
GOutside now on Oroduin, with lava at their back,
CThey're suffering suffocation Gand a sentiment D7attack.
GThe Hobbits fade to silence as the fB7ilm fades to Emblack,
AmAnd I thought that D7it was Gdone.
[Verse 5]
GBut the film flickers on again, my bladder gives a scream,
CThe eagles come and rescue them and Gthey rejoin their D7team.
GA happy ending after all, at B7least that's what it Emseems,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Chorus]
GOh, good lord I need a loo break,
COh, good lord I need a Gloo break,
GOh, good lord I need a Emloo break,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 6]
GBack again in gondor and the king sings to his folks,
CThese many movie endings are Gkind of cruel D7hoax.
GI wish I hadn't drunk those extra B7king-sized Hobbit Emcokes,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 7]
GArwen meets her king and it's exactly as she feared,
CShe told him to get shaved, instead the Gmongrel's grown a D7beard.
GBut finally, finale, and the HobbiB7ts are all cheeredEm,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Chorus]
GOh, good lord I need a loo break,
COh, good lord I need a Gloo break,
GOh, good lord I need a Emloo break,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 8]
GAnother day, another place, we're back now in The Shire,
CMy back teeth are now floating and I Gthink I might D7expire.
GFrodo finished his book and tells young B7Sam he must Emretire,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 9]
GDown to The Grey Havens where the swan proud ships all float,
CFrodo says his last farewells while the Ghobbits sob and D7dote.
GBut my bladders sreaming "Stop the hugging, B7board the fucking Emboat!",
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Chorus]
GOh, good lord I need a loo break,
COh, good lord I need a Gloo break,
GOh, good lord I need a Emloo break,
AmBut the film keeps D7rolling Gon.
[Verse 10]
GAnd finally when everybody's sailed across the sea,
CI've lost the will to live and I've Gforgotten how to D7pee.
GAnd from the mad dash to the exits I can B7tell it's not just Emme,
AmThis film is...D7rather Glong.
[Verse 11]
GOh, great lord of the Valar, grant us all your godly powers,
CHave pity on our bladders when the GDVD's are D7ours.
GThe three extended versions will be sB7omething like twelve Emhours,
AmThis film is D7rather Glong.
[Bridge]
GSo when Frodo goes walking with three of his folks,
A7and joins in a quest with another five blokes,
Dand Gimli is telling his dwarf-tossing jokes,
Gand Gandalf is killed by a big thing that smokes,
G#Galadrial asks what a mirror revokes,
Bb7Sauruman's sacked by militant oaks,
EbIt's raining in Rohan and Legolas soaks,
G#Merry and Pippin are puffing down tokes,
AFaramir bites when his daddy provokes,
B7Gollum is planning his homicide hoax,
ERohan is riding and Theoden croaks,
AAnd Éowyn's handing out terminal pokes,
GWhen Frodo succeeds in the ultimate act,
AJust remember your urinal-D7genital tract...
[Chorus]
GAnd don't forget to have loo break,
CDon't forget to have Gloo break,
GDon't forget to have Emloo break,
AmThis film is D7rather lGong.
[Outro]
(spoken) GOne more time now!
GAnd don't forget to have loo break,
CDon't forget to have Gloo break,
GDon't forget to have Emloo break,
AmThis film is D7rather lGong.
AmThis film is D7rather lGong.

All chords in this song (13)

🎸 Tips from players

Got a tip for playing this song — capo position, easier chords, strumming? Be the first to share one.

Chord Book

670,000+ free guitar chords · free-chords.com

The Loo Break Song

by Martin Pearson

Lyrics & chords · Original key

Chords in this song · guitar

Bb7

The Loo Break Song

Martin Pearson

The Unfinished Spelling Errors of Bolkein (2004)

TTTO: The Battle Hymn of the Republic.

[Verse 1]

My eyes have seen the glory of the return of the king,

C G D7

It was three long hours of movie to destroy a single ring.

G B7 Em

But my bladder would be gladder if they'd melt the bloody thing,

Am D7 G

And bring the credits on.

[Chorus]

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

C G

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

G Em

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 2]

It started many years ago, when Sauron ruled the land,

C G D7

But Gil-Galad and Isuldur set out to thwart his plan.

G B7 Em

Young Isuldur defeated him and cut of half his hand,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 3]

Much later on in Mount Doom where the hobbits come at last,

C G D7

Frodo gives Smeagol the finger and then Gollum gets the shaft.

G B7 Em

The ring and he both melted, how we clapped and cheered and laughed,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Chorus]

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

C G

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

G Em

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 4]

Outside now on Oroduin, with lava at their back,

C G D7

They're suffering suffocation and a sentiment attack.

G B7 Em

The Hobbits fade to silence as the film fades to black,

Am D7 G

And I thought that it was done.

[Verse 5]

But the film flickers on again, my bladder gives a scream,

C G D7

The eagles come and rescue them and they rejoin their team.

G B7 Em

A happy ending after all, at least that's what it seems,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Chorus]

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

C G

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

G Em

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 6]

Back again in gondor and the king sings to his folks,

C G D7

These many movie endings are kind of cruel hoax.

G B7 Em

I wish I hadn't drunk those extra king-sized Hobbit cokes,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 7]

Arwen meets her king and it's exactly as she feared,

C G D7

She told him to get shaved, instead the mongrel's grown a beard.

G B7 Em

But finally, finale, and the Hobbits are all cheered,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Chorus]

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

C G

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

G Em

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 8]

Another day, another place, we're back now in The Shire,

C G D7

My back teeth are now floating and I think I might expire.

G B7 Em

Frodo finished his book and tells young Sam he must retire,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 9]

Down to The Grey Havens where the swan proud ships all float,

C G D7

Frodo says his last farewells while the hobbits sob and dote.

G B7 Em

But my bladders sreaming "Stop the hugging, board the fucking boat!",

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Chorus]

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

C G

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

G Em

Oh, good lord I need a loo break,

Am D7 G

But the film keeps rolling on.

[Verse 10]

And finally when everybody's sailed across the sea,

C G D7

I've lost the will to live and I've forgotten how to pee.

G B7 Em

And from the mad dash to the exits I can tell it's not just me,

Am D7 G

This film is...rather long.

[Verse 11]

Oh, great lord of the Valar, grant us all your godly powers,

C G D7

Have pity on our bladders when the DVD's are ours.

G B7 Em

The three extended versions will be something like twelve hours,

Am D7 G

This film is rather long.

[Bridge]

So when Frodo goes walking with three of his folks,

and joins in a quest with another five blokes,

and Gimli is telling his dwarf-tossing jokes,

and Gandalf is killed by a big thing that smokes,

Galadrial asks what a mirror revokes,

Bb7

Sauruman's sacked by militant oaks,

It's raining in Rohan and Legolas soaks,

Merry and Pippin are puffing down tokes,

Faramir bites when his daddy provokes,

Gollum is planning his homicide hoax,

Rohan is riding and Theoden croaks,

And Éowyn's handing out terminal pokes,

When Frodo succeeds in the ultimate act,

A D7

Just remember your urinal-genital tract...

[Chorus]

And don't forget to have loo break,

C G

Don't forget to have loo break,

G Em

Don't forget to have loo break,

Am D7 G

This film is rather long.

[Outro]

(spoken) One more time now!

And don't forget to have loo break,

C G

Don't forget to have loo break,

G Em

Don't forget to have loo break,

Am D7 G

This film is rather long.

Am D7 G

This film is rather long.

About The Loo Break Song Chords by Martin Pearson

Learn how to play The Loo Break Song by Martin Pearson with free guitar chords, lyrics, and interactive chord diagrams. Search for “The Loo Break Song chords”, “The Loo Break Song guitar chords”, or “Martin Pearson The Loo Break Song chords” and you will find this page — transpose to any key, tap chords for diagrams, and use auto-scroll while you play. Perfect for beginners looking for easy The Loo Break Song chords and for experienced players who want accurate The Loo Break Song lyrics and chords in one place. Common chords in this song include G, C, D7, B7, Em, Am.

FAQ — The Loo Break Song by Martin Pearson

How do I play "The Loo Break Song" by Martin Pearson on guitar?

Open the free chords for "The Loo Break Song" by Martin Pearson on Free Chord Book. Tap any chord to see its diagram, use transpose to change the key, and turn on auto-scroll to play hands-free.

Are the chords for "The Loo Break Song" by Martin Pearson free?

Yes. The chords for "The Loo Break Song" by Martin Pearson are 100% free on Free Chord Book — no sign-up required.

Can I transpose "The Loo Break Song" to a different key?

Yes. Use the transpose buttons on the song page to shift "The Loo Break Song" up or down by half-steps so it matches your vocal range or capo position.

Can I see chord diagrams for "The Loo Break Song"?

Yes. Tap any chord in "The Loo Break Song" to instantly see an interactive guitar chord diagram with alternate fingerings.

Is "The Loo Break Song" easy to play on guitar?

Many players learn "The Loo Break Song" by Martin Pearson with our free chords. Use transpose and chord diagrams to simplify tricky shapes, and browse related songs by Martin Pearson below.

What key is "The Loo Break Song" in?

The chords for "The Loo Break Song" show the original chord names (including G, C, D7, B7, Em, Am). Use transpose to move the song into any key that fits your voice or capo.