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Twisted - I Steal Everything

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Dminor

90BPM

Lyrics & ChordsClick chords to see diagrams

C
Want Ffood, but got no Dmmoney?
I'm sEbcrewed, or so it would Gseem
That's why AmI came up Dmwith this brilliant Gscheme
CJust steal everything!
(spoken)
FAlright, monkey, let's feast!
[MONKEY, spoken]
Yeah, yeah!
[ALADDIN, spoken]
BbUgh. Raisins. I Am7hate raisins.
Hey, little D7orphan kids, you guys hungry?
G7Want some bread?
[ORPHAN KID, spoken]
We do, sir.
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Fetch, you fucks!
(Sung)
For F7real, I'm not that Dm7picky
I'll Bb7steal whatever's in B7sight
DA7on't judge, 'D7cause you don't undersG7tand my plight
[ORPHAN KID, spoken]
Hey, my crutch!
[ALADDIN, sung]
It's mine now, loser
 CI steal everything
[CITIZEN, spoken]
F7Bread! Bread for sale! ReFasonably priced for these hard times!
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Ah, hey there, friendo!
[CITIZEN, spoken]
DmNot you again! PEblease, you—you just stole a
 loaf of bread from me this B7morning!
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Yeah, and you gotta stop putting raisins Amin it, man.
I Dmhate raisins.
GmI was talkin' to Monkey about it, and he thinks
              CN.C.
we should just kill you!
N.C.
But I was like, no, Monkey, that's crazy!
N.C.
But now I'm kinda thinking... yeah.
                          N.C.   F  
...No more fucking raisins.
(Sung)
Did you F7know in this barbaric counEb7try
They only Bb7give you money if you Db7work?
G7Thanks, but no thanks, C7the man
I'll keep stealing D7all I can,
InBb7stead of being a fascist yuppie C7jerk
[CITIZENS]
FHippie!
EbFucker!
ASlacker!
[ALADDIN]
DSucker!
Gm7Who would seek empC7loyment
When life D7offers such enGmjoyment?
EbAnything I get, I can get for Dbfree
CBesides, the economy's Gshit
So I Fmake haste when making exits
Get Bbchased by a murderB7ous mob
A7Hey man, Dmstill beats getting a G7job
(spoken)
Am I C7right?
[OLDER WOMAN, spoken]
F7Getting in trouble a little Bbearly today, aren't we Aladdin?
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Bb7You're only in trouble if you get F7caught.
[WOMAN, spoken]
F7Aladdin?
[ALADDIN, spoken]
N.C.
I'm in trouble
[WOMAN, spoken]
F7After that night we spent together, my
Dm7belly grows big with child.
Eb7My father says that you must marry me
 now, or I'll bring dishonor B7to my entire family.
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Woah, woah, woah, woah, Fwoah
I can't give up on my dreams and settlDme down
 just because your dad's being a dick.
GmBesides, if I do marry, G7I want it to be for love.
[WOMAN, spoken]
Oh, Aladdin... I understand.
[ALADDIN, spoken]
You're such a special girl, Jezebel.
[WOMAN, spoken]
Who's Jezebel?!
[ALADDIN, spoken]
Uh oh - Busted!C  
[WOMAN, sung]
FAsshole!
[ALADDIN]
EbOh, wow.
[WOMAN'S FATHER]
ADouchebag!
[ALADDIN]
DHey now!
GmJust one question, wChy, man?
[WOMAN'S FATHER]
'Cause you Dstole my daughter's Gmhymen!
[ALADDIN]
    N.C.
That's completely fair, but in my defense,
Dude, your daughter's hot.C  
 FI feel that it's my duty
 to Ebsteal, 'cause stealing's Ban art
I'll steal Amclothing and shelter, whatever I lack
BbCandy from babies, the shirt off your back!
GCredit, identities, thunder, and scenes
CIntellectual property, whatever that means.
AAnd if you'll lDook closer,
This Gpoor little orphan
will steal Cyour heaFrt!

All chords in this song (24)

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Twisted - I Steal Everything

by Starkid

Lyrics & chords · Original key

Chords in this song · guitar

Am7

Dm7

Bb7

Eb7

Db7

Gm7

F Dm

Want food, but got no money?

Eb G

I'm screwed, or so it would seem

Am Dm G

That's why I came up with this brilliant scheme

Just steal everything!

(spoken)

Alright, monkey, let's feast!

[MONKEY, spoken]

Yeah, yeah!

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Bb Am7

Ugh. Raisins. I hate raisins.

Hey, little orphan kids, you guys hungry?

Want some bread?

[ORPHAN KID, spoken]

We do, sir.

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Fetch, you fucks!

(Sung)

F7 Dm7

For real, I'm not that picky

Bb7 B7

I'll steal whatever's in sight

A7 D7 G7

Don't judge, 'cause you don't understand my plight

[ORPHAN KID, spoken]

Hey, my crutch!

[ALADDIN, sung]

It's mine now, loser

I steal everything

[CITIZEN, spoken]

F7 F

Bread! Bread for sale! Reasonably priced for these hard times!

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Ah, hey there, friendo!

[CITIZEN, spoken]

Dm Eb

Not you again! Please, you—you just stole a

loaf of bread from me this morning!

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Yeah, and you gotta stop putting raisins in it, man.

I hate raisins.

I was talkin' to Monkey about it, and he thinks

N.C.

we should just kill you!

N.C.

But I was like, no, Monkey, that's crazy!

N.C.

But now I'm kinda thinking... yeah.

N.C.

...No more fucking raisins.

(Sung)

F7 Eb7

Did you know in this barbaric country

Bb7 Db7

They only give you money if you work?

G7 C7

Thanks, but no thanks, the man

I'll keep stealing all I can,

Bb7 C7

Instead of being a fascist yuppie jerk

[CITIZENS]

Hippie!

Fucker!

Slacker!

[ALADDIN]

Sucker!

Gm7 C7

Who would seek employment

D7 Gm

When life offers such enjoyment?

Eb Db

Anything I get, I can get for free

C G

Besides, the economy's shit

So I make haste when making exits

Bb B7

Get chased by a murderous mob

A7 Dm G7

Hey man, still beats getting a job

(spoken)

Am I right?

[OLDER WOMAN, spoken]

F7 Bb

Getting in trouble a little early today, aren't we Aladdin?

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Bb7 F7

You're only in trouble if you get caught.

[WOMAN, spoken]

Aladdin?

[ALADDIN, spoken]

N.C.

I'm in trouble

[WOMAN, spoken]

After that night we spent together, my

Dm7

belly grows big with child.

Eb7

My father says that you must marry me

now, or I'll bring dishonor to my entire family.

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah

I can't give up on my dreams and settle down

just because your dad's being a dick.

Gm G7

Besides, if I do marry, I want it to be for love.

[WOMAN, spoken]

Oh, Aladdin... I understand.

[ALADDIN, spoken]

You're such a special girl, Jezebel.

[WOMAN, spoken]

Who's Jezebel?!

[ALADDIN, spoken]

Uh oh - Busted!

[WOMAN, sung]

Asshole!

[ALADDIN]

Oh, wow.

[WOMAN'S FATHER]

Douchebag!

[ALADDIN]

Hey now!

Gm C

Just one question, why, man?

[WOMAN'S FATHER]

D Gm

'Cause you stole my daughter's hymen!

[ALADDIN]

N.C.

That's completely fair, but in my defense,

Dude, your daughter's hot.

I feel that it's my duty

Eb B

to steal, 'cause stealing's an art

I'll steal clothing and shelter, whatever I lack

Candy from babies, the shirt off your back!

Credit, identities, thunder, and scenes

Intellectual property, whatever that means.

A D

And if you'll look closer,

This poor little orphan

C F

will steal your heart!

About Twisted - I Steal Everything Chords by Starkid

Learn how to play Twisted - I Steal Everything by Starkid with free guitar chords, lyrics, and interactive chord diagrams. Search for “Twisted - I Steal Everything chords”, “Twisted - I Steal Everything guitar chords”, or “Starkid Twisted - I Steal Everything chords” and you will find this page — transpose to any key, tap chords for diagrams, and use auto-scroll while you play. Perfect for beginners looking for easy Twisted - I Steal Everything chords and for experienced players who want accurate Twisted - I Steal Everything lyrics and chords in one place. Common chords in this song include C, F, Dm, Eb, G, Am.

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The chords for "Twisted - I Steal Everything" show the original chord names (including C, F, Dm, Eb, G, Am). Use transpose to move the song into any key that fits your voice or capo.