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Statistically Speaking

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Fmajor

90BPM

Lyrics & ChordsClick chords to see diagrams

[Verse 1]
FPopulation densiBbty around the world Dmvaries (It varies)
CIt varies (It's extremely variable)
FAnd that makes it very trAmicky to find a lover you will Bbcherish
(You will Ccherish)
[Verse 2]
I Amspoke to a statisBbtician on the matter
He said, Am"James, I'm actually in a meeting,uh, can you Bbcome back here in an hour?"
So I Amdid and he told me Bbwhat I'm gonna to say to Cyou
N.C.
He's going to say those things to you
[Interlude]
  FQuestioBbn:  CWheFre are the gospel singers?Bb  C  
I Fthought we hired gospel singersBb  C  
FAre they, are they not coming?
[Verse 3]
FStatistically speaking, my Bbone true Clove lives in FChina
N.C.
How will I find her?
FStatistically speaking, my Bbone true Clove speaks FChinese
And drinks Bbmany Cteas
And AmI can't Bbspeak Chinese, nor AmMandarin nor BbCantonese
And to be Amhonest, those don't sound like Bblanguages
They sound like FrestauCrants
[Verse 4]
In fact, the Bbdifference in cultures would Fmean that I would need to learn a Bbwhole lot more about GmChina
Than a Gmseries of cultural stereotypesF  C  
Albeit told in a GmQuasi-irDmonic wCay
N.C.
It genuinely bears repeating that
A GmQuasi-irDmonic wCay
N.C.
And then we, we Radiohead this shit
[Verse 5]
     FLet me Bbtake you dFown
'Cause Fwhat's the point in going out on Amweekends?
You Bbmay as well stay in and Clie in bed
'Cause there are F7 billion people in the Amworld
And only Bb17 of them are in the COld King's Head
I think Fgovernments around the Amworld should spend
Their BbGNP on a speed-Cdating event
'Cause FI don't believe in destiny
The Amstars or serendipity
They're Bbways of dealing with Centropy
[Verse 6]
N.C.
But you say
"FJames, I met my girlfriend in a Amlido
These things Bbreally do happen, you just Chave to wait and see"
I say
"FYes but you were working in the Amlido
You Bbadded her on Facebook; I Cthink that's creepy."
[Interlude]
  FHmmBb  C  
  FInstrumentalBb  C  
 F   F   Bb   C[2x]
[Verse 7]
And I'm Fsaying all these things in the AmOld King's Head
I've had Bbthree Staropramens and I Cwish I was in bed
But is Fthat a group of girls walking Amin that I see?
I Bbrecognise one and she Clooks at me
[Verse 8]
She's got Fbright red hair and AmSpanish eyes
BbDungarees and a disCarming smile
I Fwant to talk to her but I've Amgot the fear
Then Bbsuddenly I see her coming Cover here
CPanic, she's coming over
[Verse 9]
She says
"FJames I like your songs and I Amthink you're kind of funny
It Bbdoesn't bother me that you've Cgot no money
The Fworld's a crazy place but Amit gets better
BbCome with me and we'll be Cterrified Ftogether"
[Chorus]
So, just be Fpatient and you will Amfind her
BbYou don't need to go to CChina
Just be Fpatient and you will Amfind her
BbYou don't need to go to CChina
Just be Fpatient and you will Amfind her
BbYou don't need to go to CChina
Just be Fpatient and you will Amfind her
BbYou don't need to go to CChina
C(abrupt key change!)
Just be Abpatient and you will Cmfind her
DbYou don't need to go to EbChina
Just be Abpatient and you will Cmfind her
DbYou don't need to Ebgo to AbChina
[Outro]
N.C.
Go if you want. I'm not saying don't go
N.C.
Just, it was ironic

All chords in this song (10)

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Statistically Speaking

by James Veitch

Lyrics & chords · Original key

Chords in this song · guitar

[Verse 1]

F Bb Dm

Population density around the world varies (It varies)

It varies (It's extremely variable)

F Am Bb

And that makes it very tricky to find a lover you will cherish

(You will cherish)

[Verse 2]

Am Bb

I spoke to a statistician on the matter

Am Bb

He said, "James, I'm actually in a meeting,uh, can you come back here in an hour?"

Am Bb C

So I did and he told me what I'm gonna to say to you

N.C.

He's going to say those things to you

[Interlude]

F Bb C F Bb C

Question: Where are the gospel singers?

F Bb C

I thought we hired gospel singers

Are they, are they not coming?

[Verse 3]

F Bb C F

Statistically speaking, my one true love lives in China

N.C.

How will I find her?

F Bb C F

Statistically speaking, my one true love speaks Chinese

Bb C

And drinks many teas

Am Bb Am Bb

And I can't speak Chinese, nor Mandarin nor Cantonese

Am Bb

And to be honest, those don't sound like languages

F C

They sound like restaurants

[Verse 4]

Bb F Bb Gm

In fact, the difference in cultures would mean that I would need to learn a whole lot more about China

Gm F C

Than a series of cultural stereotypes

Gm Dm C

Albeit told in a Quasi-ironic way

N.C.

It genuinely bears repeating that

Gm Dm C

A Quasi-ironic way

N.C.

And then we, we Radiohead this shit

[Verse 5]

F Bb F

Let me take you down

F Am

'Cause what's the point in going out on weekends?

Bb C

You may as well stay in and lie in bed

F Am

'Cause there are 7 billion people in the world

Bb C

And only 17 of them are in the Old King's Head

F Am

I think governments around the world should spend

Bb C

Their GNP on a speed-dating event

'Cause I don't believe in destiny

The stars or serendipity

Bb C

They're ways of dealing with entropy

[Verse 6]

N.C.

But you say

F Am

"James, I met my girlfriend in a lido

Bb C

These things really do happen, you just have to wait and see"

I say

F Am

"Yes but you were working in the lido

Bb C

You added her on Facebook; I think that's creepy."

[Interlude]

F Bb C

Hmm

F Bb C

Instrumental

F F Bb C

[2x]

[Verse 7]

F Am

And I'm saying all these things in the Old King's Head

Bb C

I've had three Staropramens and I wish I was in bed

F Am

But is that a group of girls walking in that I see?

Bb C

I recognise one and she looks at me

[Verse 8]

F Am

She's got bright red hair and Spanish eyes

Bb C

Dungarees and a disarming smile

F Am

I want to talk to her but I've got the fear

Bb C

Then suddenly I see her coming over here

Panic, she's coming over

[Verse 9]

She says

F Am

"James I like your songs and I think you're kind of funny

Bb C

It doesn't bother me that you've got no money

F Am

The world's a crazy place but it gets better

Bb C F

Come with me and we'll be terrified together"

[Chorus]

F Am

So, just be patient and you will find her

Bb C

You don't need to go to China

F Am