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Epiphany

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Amajor

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[Intro 1]
(Talking)
      AmI can recall the day quite clearly. A Friday in July. A sweltering eighty degrees. 
AmMartin Jarvis was completing his week in dictionary corner; he’d been reassuringly average. 
AmSomewhere in the Shires, surgeons had entered the mind of Mr Stinchcombe and found black apes, 
Amgibbering on dark lawns. I’d spent the afternoon becoming increasingly frustrated with the 
Amgrooming agitator on my lime Dyson. I was due in Parbold at seven fifteen, and wasn’t going to make it. 
AmTelephoning the person who needed to know this, I found myself caught up on a crossed line, 
Amsomething I’d not experienced for years. I listened in with quiet delight.
[Intro 1 cont.]
(Talking)
AmIt appeared that someone called Bill, whilst out walking the bounds that morning, 
Amhad looked in to Top Acre, and been horrified to see the almost visible ribcage of a foal, 
Amwhich belonged to the straggle-haired girl from Keeper’s cottage, whose name, 
Amif this was a Helen Fielding novel, would be something like ‘Martha Flanagan’. 
AmBut the countryside is never as romantic as townsfolk believe it to be, 
Amand the girl’s name was Karen Henderson. On closer inspection of the poor emaciated beast, 
Amit was agreed that a visit upon the child’s father was in order. 
AmNot a mission to relish apparently, as the man in question was affected by a strange disquiet, 
Amwhich gnawed away at his faith, and it was rumoured his days were spent sucking on the 
Ambleached bones of his dead mates, whilst writing songs for the hospice – one of which goes like this:
[Verse 1]
Na na na na na na na Ena na na Amna,   Na na na na na na na Ena na na Amna
Na na na na na na na Ena na na Amna,   Na na na na na na na Ena na na Amna.
Oh sucking on the bleached bones of my dead mates
Trying to get to Parbold for a quarter past Eseven, and it isn’t gonna Amhappen.
[Verse 2]
Hospice, I Ethink you’re marvellous, Amhospice I Esing your praises
 AmOn high Edays and holidays; AmI big you up on Ehigh days and holidays
 AmI hear you go on Esome good outings; AmI’d like to go on Eone of your outings
 AmPlease take me with you on Eone of your outings.
[Chorus]
 AI heard you’re Dgoing to ABilling EAquadrome
 AI hear you’re Dgoing to ABilling EAquadrome
 AI’ve never Dbeen to ABilling EAquadrome
 ALet me go Dwith you to ABilling EAquadrome
 APlease let me Dgo to ABilling EAquadromeA……D……A….E.A  D  A  E  
[Coda]
I’ll be Abusking Dthis at EmAbankmentE  
I’ll be Abusking Dthis at EmAbankmentE  
I’ll be Abusking Dthis at EmAbankment Etube toAmorrowD.A  E  A  D  A  E  
 AJanuary the Dsixth.   A     E     AEDpiphany.

All chords in this song (4)

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Epiphany

by Half Man Half Biscuit

Lyrics & chords · Original key

Chords in this song · guitar

[Intro 1]

(Talking)

I can recall the day quite clearly. A Friday in July. A sweltering eighty degrees.

Martin Jarvis was completing his week in dictionary corner; he’d been reassuringly average.

Somewhere in the Shires, surgeons had entered the mind of Mr Stinchcombe and found black apes,

gibbering on dark lawns. I’d spent the afternoon becoming increasingly frustrated with the

grooming agitator on my lime Dyson. I was due in Parbold at seven fifteen, and wasn’t going to make it.

Telephoning the person who needed to know this, I found myself caught up on a crossed line,

something I’d not experienced for years. I listened in with quiet delight.

[Intro 1 cont.]

(Talking)

It appeared that someone called Bill, whilst out walking the bounds that morning,

had looked in to Top Acre, and been horrified to see the almost visible ribcage of a foal,

which belonged to the straggle-haired girl from Keeper’s cottage, whose name,

if this was a Helen Fielding novel, would be something like ‘Martha Flanagan’.

But the countryside is never as romantic as townsfolk believe it to be,

and the girl’s name was Karen Henderson. On closer inspection of the poor emaciated beast,

it was agreed that a visit upon the child’s father was in order.

Not a mission to relish apparently, as the man in question was affected by a strange disquiet,

which gnawed away at his faith, and it was rumoured his days were spent sucking on the

bleached bones of his dead mates, whilst writing songs for the hospice – one of which goes like this:

[Verse 1]

E Am E Am

Na na na na na na na na na na na, Na na na na na na na na na na na

E Am E Am

Na na na na na na na na na na na, Na na na na na na na na na na na.

Oh sucking on the bleached bones of my dead mates

E Am

Trying to get to Parbold for a quarter past seven, and it isn’t gonna happen.

[Verse 2]

E Am E

Hospice, I think you’re marvellous, hospice I sing your praises

Am E Am E

On high days and holidays; I big you up on high days and holidays

Am E Am E

I hear you go on some good outings; I’d like to go on one of your outings

Am E

Please take me with you on one of your outings.

[Chorus]

A D A E

I heard you’re going to Billing Aquadrome

A D A E

I hear you’re going to Billing Aquadrome

A D A E

I’ve never been to Billing Aquadrome

A D A E

Let me go with you to Billing Aquadrome

A D A E A D A E A D A E

Please let me go to Billing Aquadrome……………..

[Coda]

A D A E

I’ll be busking this at Embankment

A D A E

I’ll be busking this at Embankment

A D A E A D A E A D A E

I’ll be busking this at Embankment tube tomorrow.

A D A E A D

January the sixth. Epiphany.

About Epiphany Chords by Half Man Half Biscuit

Learn how to play Epiphany by Half Man Half Biscuit with free guitar chords, lyrics, and interactive chord diagrams. Search for “Epiphany chords”, “Epiphany guitar chords”, or “Half Man Half Biscuit Epiphany chords” and you will find this page — transpose to any key, tap chords for diagrams, and use auto-scroll while you play. Perfect for beginners looking for easy Epiphany chords and for experienced players who want accurate Epiphany lyrics and chords in one place. Common chords in this song include Am, A, E, D.

FAQ — Epiphany by Half Man Half Biscuit

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What key is "Epiphany" in?

The chords for "Epiphany" show the original chord names (including Am, A, E, D). Use transpose to move the song into any key that fits your voice or capo.